The Westminster Dog Show is this week. And judging by this photo, it's also a time to for judges to totally abuse the crap out of cute defenseless puppies.

Here's are some of the models in the 2009 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue. As you can probably imagine, they are all horrendously hot.

Here's are some of the models in the 2009 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue. As you can probably imagine, they are all horrendously hot.

And by "assets", of course, we mean the things that make Susan Sarandon less annoying as an actress, activist and overall human being. Here's a recent photo of her at the SAG awards, along with her daughter Eva Amurii.

...the blood out of you!!! Watch out for her teeth...and her boyfriend from Sum 41. That dude will slap you if you mess with Avril!

It seems like all the weight just goes to her boobs. And her face. And arms. Ass. Legs. Stomach. Jesus H. Christ, this girl's a hot mess.

What a comeback. Now all she needs to do is find her brain and she'll finally be complete.

Nikki Cox used to be our #1 squeeze. Now she's the picture of death. Rollover the picture to see what we're talking about.

Nothing helps you lose weight faster than looking at pictures of celebrities in the best and worst moments.

Paris kept her promises and immediately opened a shelter for women when she was released from jail. Here you can see her passing out soup to the needy. What a heart of gold!

What a perfect way to end the year with a big pile of Katy Perry's boobies. Enjoy!

I wish all Holiday seasons were filled with this much love.

What's the point of a calendar filled with boobs? It's not like you're going to be looking at the dates anyway. You're going to be looking at the boobs. Just take the dates away and leave the boobs.

Wouldn't it suck if she was really holding a pair of balls?

Laura Harring, aka that hot chick from the movie Mulholland Drive, obviously needs a new stylist for her head.

Here's an image from the Jessica Alba Campari calendar that's coming out. They could sell this thing without the calendar for all we care. Everyday is Alba day to us!

With the Death Star complete and Santa out of the way, nothing can stop them from destroying Alderon!

I dare you to say one bad thing about this girl.

And by "kind of" we mean OMFG TOTALLY.

Why must we always post pictures of Obama Girl? Because she's really easy to look at, that's why.